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Главный орган у человека — это задница. Во всем принимает участие: в лечении, учении, воспитании, принятии решений. А в поиске приключений ей вообще равных нет.
* * *
– Маня, не танцуй!
– Почему?
– Ну не танцуй, и все!
– Ну почему? Песня ведь классная!
– Держи руль!..
* * *
Я всегда была уверена, что на том языке, на котором пишут врачи, машинисты пригородных поездов объявляют остановки.

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БИЗНЕС-ГОРОСКОП (1–15 июля 2018 года)

БИЗНЕС-ГОРОСКОП (1–15 июля  2018 года)

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Russia Prepares to Blacklist Five ‘Undesirable’ U.S. Media Outlets

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Russian senators have drawn up  a list of five U.S.-based media outlets, including CNN, whose activities in Russia could be restricted in response to a requirement to have the American branch of Russia’s state-funded RT television channel register as a foreign agent.
The U.S. Justice Department has asked that the Kremlin-backed RT adhere to a 1930s foreign agent registration law over concerns of Russian meddling in the 2016 presidential elections. Russian prosecutors are examining the possibility of labeling U.S. outlets as “undesirable” in response.


Socialite Ksenia Sobchak Announces Bid for Russian Presidency

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Russian journalist and socialite Ksenia Sobchak made the announcement Wednesday on a special episode of her “Sobchak Live” show on opposition-leaning Dozhd TV news channel.
She also sent a letter to the daily Vedomosti news site outlining her reasons for running against Putin, who is expected to confirm his candidacy at the Valdai conference Oct. 19, where the Kremlin said he will make “an important announcement.”
Sobchak said elections in which prominent opposition leader Alexei Navalny — barred from running over fraud convictions — was not allowed to participate should not be boycotted.


St. Petersburg Teacher Who Wrote ‘Fool’ on Boy’s Forehead Forced to Resign

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A teacher at the Keeper School in St. Petersburg has quit her job after getting creative with a felt-tip pen and a student’s forehead. Olga Alferova last week wrote the word “fool” on the face of an 8-year-old schoolboy boy named Lyosha to discipline him, the St. Petersburg news site Fontanka reported.
She had reportedly warned her class in advance that would be the punishment for those who wrote on their hands with markers, a popular recess activity among students. Following complaints from Lyosha’s mother, Alferova was summoned to the principal’s office. “What has my Lyosha done to offend you?” the mother reportedly asked, to which the teacher replied: “Nothing, it was just how it was”. In comments to Fontanka.ru, the city’s education committee described the teacher’s behavior as “not pedagogical.” A district official expressed dismay that such an incident had occurred on the eve of Teacher’s Day on Oct. 5.


Steven Seagal Doesn’t Talk About Politics With Pal Putin

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American movie star and recent Russian citizen Steven Seagal told British television he’s personally acquainted with President Vladimir Putin and talks to him on a wide range of subjects, but not politics. Seagal, who was awarded Russian citizenship by Putin last November, is one of several late-career celebrities to become naturalized after American boxer Roy Jones Jr. and French actor Gerard Depardieu. Speaking on a British morning show on Wednesday via satellite from Moscow, Seagal said he’s had many direct dealings with the Russian president.“Him and I started out becoming friends over the martial arts,” he told the Good Morning Britain show on the ITV television channel. “We don’t have a political relationship,” Seagal said, “We really talk about the martial arts, philosophy, people and dilemmas in life.” Asked about allegations of Russian interference in the 2016 U.S. presidential elections, the aging actor dismissed the notion as “stupid.”


Russian Officials Ban Dogs Barking at Night

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Dogs and cats are banned from barking and meowing late at night in the Siberian region of Novosibirsk, the Interfax-Sibir news agency reported Thursday. The region is currently under an ordinance banning noise in apartment buildings. Violations carry a 3,000-ruble ($51.4) fine for individuals and 5,000 rubles for officials. The Novosibirsk legislative assembly voted 54-3 in favor of amending the noise-observance law to include dog and cat owners, Interfax-Sibir reported on Thursday. Novosibirsk region’s new legislation requires pet owners to suppress barking, howling and meowing, actions that constitute a public nuisance. “Oinking, crowing and quacking are allowed,” the amendment’s author Yevgeny Smyshlyayev was quoted by Interfax-Sibir as saying.


Russia Has the Fastest Growing Number of Millionaires in the World

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Russia has the fastest-growing number of dollar millionaires in the world, the consulting company Capgemini said in its annual report on global wealth.  In 2016, the number of people with assets worth $1 million or more in Russia rose by 19.7 percent, according to Capgemini’s World Wealth Report 2017. In 2015, the number of millionaires in Russia declined by 1.8 percent. The numbers show Russian entrepreneurs are starting to recover from the economic crisis of recent years, the RBC media outlet reports. But, with 182,000 millionaires, Russia still lags behind many other countries. This year, Russia ranks 15th for the number of millionaires, after the U.S., Japan, Germany, and China, but places above Saudi Arabia, Kuwait and Norway. A recent study by the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER) said the wealth held offshore by Russians was the equivalent of 75 percent of the country’s national income by 2015. The economists concluded Russia had “an extreme level of inequality,” with the top 1 percent holding up to 25 percent of Russia’s wealth.


Russia’s Most Crooked Streets Are in Sochi

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Using data from its maps service, tech giant Yandex analyzed more than half a million roads across 43,000 Russian towns and cities. It calculated the length, number of curves and turns, and the ratio of their length to the shortest distance between start and end points. Sochi was named the “champion in streets with bends and turns,” with 15 out of the country’s 100 most curvy streets, while most other cities only have one or two, the company said. Russia’s streets span a total 395,000 kilometers — a distance that would take an average pedestrian nine years to cover. With 3,800 streets, Moscow leads both in terms of the number and length. Roads named after Bolshevik revolutionary Vladimir Lenin — of which there are 6569 in Russia — tend to be longer than one kilometer. “Streets named after poet Alexander Pushkin and cosmonaut Yury Gagarin are in general a lot shorter,” the company said.


Moscow Metro to Introduce Fare Payment Rings

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Muscovites could soon pay for their metro rides with a ring expected to go on sale later this month, its developer told the Govorit Moskva news agency on Tuesday. The Moscow-based PayRing company brands its product as a contactless bank card in the form of a ring. A company employee said deliveries would start in late October. A spokesperson for the Moscow metro told the RBC outlet that the gadget will allow commuters to pay their fare anywhere that accepts the Troika transport card. The pass gives commuters access to Moscow’s bus, train and metro systems and is currently used by an estimated 10.5 million people. “It will be the first time ever worldwide that a ring can be used as payment for public transport,” the spokesperson was quoted as saying.  The payment rings will go on sale at the Moscow metro’s two souvenir shops and kiosks at a dozen stations across the Russian capital, said RBC. It is as yet unclear how much the gadgets will cost.

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